You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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