i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
