I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
