Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
