On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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