hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
