I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize