sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Randomize
