i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
you win again, gameday.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
