You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
how do flat chested girls get laid?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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