dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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