glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
