so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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