chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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