I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
