He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
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