she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
