where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
