People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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