She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Found your dick twin last night
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
