We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
