grandma shit on top of the toilet
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
