ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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