He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
