why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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