I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
thus making me awesome and them whores
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
