He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
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