I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
