...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Of course I have a pirate flag
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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