He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
