google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
