What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
