im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
