just come out here and I will go home with you...
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Mom said you looked used
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
