playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
a search helicopter?!
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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