I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
