i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
