So drunk its hurt
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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