You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
