...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
