Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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