I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Banned from zoo.
Again?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Randomize
