Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
