and next time when you feel me up, do it right
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
