I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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