she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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