what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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