I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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