Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
