i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
